As a family that’s guided countless couples through their special day, we’ve seen firsthand how the small decisions can create the most meaningful memories. One question we’re asked frequently during our planning sessions: “Should we do a first look at our Chicago wedding or wait until the ceremony?”
It’s a choice that truly sets the tone for your celebration, and it’s a moment that is nothing short of heartwarming. In fact, nearly half of the couples who celebrate with us choose a first look, but that doesn’t mean it’s right for everyone!
Let’s walk through this important decision together — just as we would during one of our planning meetings at The Haight — to find out if you should have first look wedding photos or not.
First Look Pros
Choosing to incorporate a first look at your wedding means you have yet another opportunity to capture your love story. It’s often a beautiful, emotional moment that couples love to reflect on years later. Here are a few of the reasons we encourage you to add a first look to your wedding!
Pro #1: More Time to Celebrate with Your Loved Ones
A first look gives you more time with your guests instead of missing the cocktail hour for photos. You’ll actually get to enjoy those signature drinks and chat away with the people you love because all your photos were taken care of before the reception.
Depending on your ceremony time, a first look might let you capture that gorgeous late-afternoon sunlight too, giving you full use of our beautiful spaces!
Pro #2: A Moment Just for the Two of You
In our years hosting weddings, we’ve noticed something special about couples who choose first looks. Your wedding day moves so quickly, but a first look creates a pause that belongs to just you two in the middle of a day that you’re sharing with many others.
When it’s just you (and your photographer at a distance), you can react authentically without thinking about the hundred eyes watching. Wedding days are emotional, and having each other to lean on early in the day can center you both in a way that many couples find invaluable!
Pro #3: Photos That Capture Both of Your Reactions
First looks allow photographers to capture not just the initial reaction, but all the beautiful moments that follow. And you won’t have to worry about being separated by an aisle or row of chairs. It’s just you two, up close, authentic, and in real time.
Pro #4: A Calmer, More Present Experience
We’ve supported hundreds of couples through wedding-day jitters, and we’ve noticed that first looks often help reduce pre-ceremony anxiety.
It’s common to feel nervous before seeing each other, but a first look gives you the opportunity to channel those nerves into excitement! So many couples tell us their first look became a grounding moment that helped them fully engage with their ceremony later.
First Look Cons
First looks can be a beautiful experience, but they’re not for everyone. Let’s look at some of the cons that come with planning the big reveal before your ceremony.
First Look Con #1: Breaking Cherished Traditions
For many couples, the traditional aisle reveal has significance that a first look might diminish. Many of our couples, especially those with strong family traditions, worry that a first look might make that ceremonial moment feel less special or emotional.
While we’ve found that most couples still experience powerful emotions during the ceremony, regardless, this concern is completely valid and worth considering!
First Look Con #2: Missing the Shared Emotional Experience
One of the most meaningful aspects of a traditional ceremony reveal is that everyone experiences that powerful moment together. When your partner sees you for the first time walking down our grand aisle, your parents, grandparents, and best friends get to witness it too.
It’s one of the best moments of the wedding, shared with all the people you love, and it’s incredibly beautiful!
First Look Con #3: Logistical Challenges and Practical Constraints
First looks require careful planning and an earlier start to your wedding day. Your hair and makeup timeline will need to be moved up significantly, often requiring an earlier wake-up call on an already big day. For some couples, this extended timeline can lead to fatigue before the reception even begins!
Weather can also prove challenging, depending on whether your wedding is indoors or outdoors.
First Look Con #4: It May Feel Unauthentic
For many couples, they worry about the authenticity of first look photos. One concern is that couples aren’t married yet in those photos. Another concern is feeling the reaction needs to be staged, plus an added pressure to react a certain way.
Some people love leaving the first look to the aisle moment because it feels more candid and carefree!
Creative Alternatives: The Best of Both Worlds!
We love it when couples honor the uniqueness of their love story at our wedding venue in Chicago. And sometimes that means making compromises, like in the first look, that both honor tradition and offer a first look moment!
There are so many ways to do this, but one of our favorites is expanding the first look moment beyond the couple. Some of our most touching wedding moments have been fathers seeing their daughters before the ceremony. Or when the bridesmaids or groomsmen see their best friend for the first time in their wedding attire.
The big reveal is important to everyone, so if there’s someone you want to incorporate into this first look compromise, don’t be afraid to ask!
There’s No Wrong Choice, Only Your Choice!
Whether you choose to do a first look or not, remember it’s your wedding day, and you should make the best decision for you. There’s no wrong choice, just the one that fits you and your partner best!
And no matter which path you choose, our family will be here to support yours every step of the way!
Planning your special day at The Haight? Reach out to our planning team for a personalized consultation, where we can walk through our spaces and help you envision all the possibilities for your perfect day.